The Horses' Mouth by Joyce Cary

Author:Joyce Cary
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Pickle Partners Publishing
Published: 2016-10-26T00:00:00+00:00

24

When I left for home after dinner, some time after, the Professor was holding one arm and Sir William the other.

But I could not tell whether they were throwing me downstairs or protecting an honoured guest from a dangerous fall. We went home to Elsinore by car, perhaps by taxi, and somewhere on the way we were joined by Nosy Barbon. I think the Professor called for him. They seemed to know each other. And Nosy took me up to bed.

In fact, finding that I had difficulty in staying in the bed, which was narrow, and that some of the other guests were irritated against me on account of my being happy while they were in low spirits, he stayed all night.

I was grateful to the boy, but I wished he had let me wallow, especially when, in the morning, I found him much depressed; at a time when I was also depressed.

‘What are you worrying about now?’ I asked him.

‘About m-mother,’ he said. ‘I expect she sat up all night for me. She’s such a worrier.’

‘So are you,’ I said. ‘So it’s her own fault.’

‘Oh, but m-mother is a t-terrible worrier.’

‘I expect she’s fond of you,’ I said. ‘Some mothers are fond of their children. It’s natural.’

‘She’s fond of me, but I don’t think she likes me very much.’

‘A lot of mothers don’t like their children much. It’s natural. Women are so critical. The personal point of view.’

‘She hates me to do any drawing and painting. I was wondering.’ And he stopped. I knew that he wanted me to go home with him and speak to his people for him. Tell them he wanted to be an artist. But my head was bursting, my eyes were burning, my legs and arms were shooting like sore teeth, my mouth was like a dirty shoe, and I wanted to get back to work. ‘That’s enough nonsense,’ I said. ‘I’ve wasted enough time and energy on doing the polite—the sooner I can get hold of the Fall and finish it, the better. Especially if I can sell it to Beeder.’

‘Perhaps if you could come round with me,’ said Nosy.

‘Why,’ I said severely. ‘Why didn’t you go home last night?’

‘You seemed so ill I was afraid you would fall out of bed and hurt yourself.’

This made me feel more severe still. For I saw that Nosy was inclined to make heroes and sacrifice himself to them. Like my sister Jenny, who nearly killed me a hundred times with exasperation. When I saved up fifteen pounds, out of my lunches, to buy her a set of teeth, since her own had dropped out for want of looking after, she gave the money straight to her husband to he wasted on some new working model. And when I saw her still without teeth and found out what she had done with the money, she said only, ‘But I thought you wanted to please me.’

‘Of course I did. I didn’t starve myself for six months to amuse Robert.

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